There is a way out of anger, resentment and even hatred.
The answer to why we are angry isn’t out in the world - it’s within us. And it’s only bad news to our constructed self.
The child within us rejoices with this news.
Check this out...This one is a painful lesson for the self.
Think about that one person or those few folks who REALLY annoy us. Maybe they make us SUPER angry. Maybe we even hate them. Think about them for a moment...
You thinking about them??
Yeah?
Ok, so - right now, write down what makes us so mad at them. Take a second, pause reading this blog and then write it down. Do you get it?
Ok... now looking at that thing that makes us mad, chances are what makes us mad about someone else, or what makes us hate them, is an unresolved part of yourself. EEEEK! The constructed self is standing up right now and yelling - NO WAY! That’s IMPOSSIBLE! But, yes, dear self, it’s possible; in fact it is.
We resent and hate in others the unresolved parts of ourselves.
And this is awesome because we can then flip the switch and begin to see those who anger us not as enemies or nemeses, but rather as who they really are - TEACHERS.
They are teachers and guides showing us the unresolved parts of ourselves that still need work. So, our job on the Path to our recovery is to notice when we get triggered and no longer blame the other person. Instead, we can go within to see what our child within is feeling.
Below the anger is hurt. And the hurt is what we want to feel.
The hurt could come from feelings that we're not enough, not needed or that we're unseen. If we don’t feel needed, significant or like we are enough, we feel hurt. And instead of feeling the hurt and taking new action to correct the hurt emotion, we get angry and then project that on others.
We are not suggesting that this is a passive thing and that action should not be taken.
The kind of action that will change our life and eventually our world is NOT unconsciously angry action. No - but rather, conscious, loving-kindness action with awareness. And practicing Loving-kindness doesn’t mean we are a pushover. No, it means we take responsibility for our life - which means consciously choosing our actions.
Practicing Loving-Kindness includes standing up for ourself. But it also means taking responsibility for our current circumstances - no matter what is going on in our world.
This great reversal of our beliefs is one of the major lessons we are being asked to learn from contact with our child within. It’s here, today, for us to learn and integrate! So, can you celebrate and learn from those who anger you!? Do you have THAT MUCH RECOVERY?
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